PRIDE GOETH...

Tonight was such a great night.  We took Emily to a stake meeting for all the little kids who are going to be baptized.  We got there a few minutes early and we able to sit back and people watch.  At some point I noticed a girl I had known since junior high.  She was known as my, well I don't know if it's referred to as arch rival or Nemesis, or arch Nemesis, but she was it.  You know the person at school who just drove you crazy.  Well I am older and more tolerant now.  I am sure after all these years I have moved on.
Of course she was in charge of the meeting.  She looked really really old and not at all the princess I remembered.  I felt good, sitting with my handsome husband and beautiful daughter and minimal wrinkles.  I was the queen...then it happened.  My phone went off.  Yes, folks.  We are the people whose phone goes off at church.  It wasn't the ringer, because I had set it to silent on the way in, it was the alarm we have that goes off every night at 7:00 to remind us to read our scriptures.  You know the alarm that goes on and on until you shut it off.  I couldn't find the phone.  I was fumbling around in horror trying to shut the darn thing off when my handsome husband stepped in. 
"You need to shut that off!"
No kidding.  I gave him the look.  So, not only was I humiliated in public, I was caught giving my husband the death ray in front of witnesses which included my bishop and his councilor who were sitting right in front of us.  I finally found it in the pocket of Emily's coat.  By that time everyone in the chapel was looking at the crazy lady frantically digging for the offensive item.  I will never scoff at that woman again.
I just thank heavens that I changed my ringer from "Crazy Train" by Ozzy Osborne. 

Then the ultimate insult.  After the meeting, the Nemesis in question came up to me and said, "Hello, Lou.  I didn't realize you were in our ward."

Lou?  Really?  Isn't it the job of your arch rival to at least get your name right?  I was thinking of getting back together with my minions at the lair to plan our revenge when I remembered something.  I am 44 years old and my daughter is being baptized in March.  Time to grow up. 

I believe that is one of the seven commandments.