AND THE OSCAR GOES TO...

And the nominees for best performance in a drama by a drama queen are:
 
Emily Heaton.

Mom:  Emily, please pick up all the clothes you left on the bathroom floor.

Emily:  Falls to the floor sobbing.  "I have to do everything!  I never get to play with my friends.  Everyone hates me."

Mom:  Makes an obscene gesture in her mind... and scene.


Emily Heaton.


Emily:  While eating dinner, coughs softly, checks to make sure everyone is watching, falls to the ground.  "I was choking!  No one helped me.  I could have died!!!"
And scene.

Emily Heaton.

Emily:  Stands gaping at the TV as an ASPCA commercial solicits funds to help save animals.  Starts to sob and runs to mom.
"Mom! you have to send them money or they are going to kill that dog!  I mean it.  Hurry!!!
And scene.


Emily Heaton.

Emily:  MOM!!!  You have to help me with my homework NOW or I will have to give Mrs. Pollock five tokens!  I think it is a coincidence that you don't help me.

Mom:   "Do you even know what coincidence means?"

Emily:  Sobbing, "No, because you wont help me with my homework."  Falls to the floor.
And Scene.

And the winner is?  Anyone who doesn't live here.  What a diva.