...BUT I NEED THE EGGS

"Mom.  You need to shut off the computer and take me to the store to get eggs, please." 
Long pause...
There is a joke I heard a long time ago.  This guy goes to a psychiatrist and says, "Doctor, I don't know what to do.  My brother thinks he is a chicken.  He clucks and pecks at his food.  He even tries to fly."  The Doctor replied very concerned.  "You need to get him some professional help."  "I would," said the man,"but I need the eggs."

In my previous life as a working mom, my family learned to make do in my absence.  My oldest daughter, Mary, had a lot of responsibilities from an early age.  When I quit my job there was a brief period where I had to put our roles back in place and be the mom again.  Things went well for a long time and she seemed to be happy to exchange all that control for a semi-normal home.  For a few years now, Mary has pretty much planned her own birthday parties.  When she was ten she went online and booked a place called Laser Mania for a party of 12, gave me a list of things she needed and we had fun.  This was the norm for a while.  It worked well for both of us.  About a week ago I found her looking at me with her lips moving saying some words and some more words and some numbers, and then she kissed me on the cheek and said she loved me and took off.  This week, as I went about my business around the house, I noticed that it was really clean and organized.  Wondering what was going on I asked who was responsible for this.  Mary said, "I am, and I need you guys to try not to mess it up before my party on Friday."  Hmmmmmmm.  That must have been the words.  The numbers were, four friends coming over for a sleep over and a barbecue.  Great.  At that moment I didn't notice that my child was treating me like one of the kids.  I didn't really care, the house was clean. 

I think some of us may have reverted back to our old ways in the last little while.  I won't mention any names, but last night I suddenly became aware of more words and more words and Mary's lips moving again. 
"MOM!  you need to make those kids clean up after themselves.  This is the third time this week I have cleaned the kitchen!"
By this time Jared and I had looked up from our computers and were looking at her with a blank stare.  I am usually at the receiving end of the blank stare.  What was happening?  The Old Mary was back and I was very afraid.  "Ok,"  we said and promptly chastised "those kids" for their messiness.  I'm sure many of you are rolling your eyes wondering what my problem is, but isn't step one to realize you have a problem?  So, back off.

Today is the day of the sleepover.  Mary came in with her list of demands errands she needed me to run for the party.  she also requested that I take the car to have it cleaned, so it would be nice and tidy for her friends.  I still really wasn't very appalled by the way she was treating me, after all, these were reasonable requests.  Who cares if she talks to me like I'm ten.  I talk to her like she is 40, so we are even.  Besides, I didn't have to do any of the thinkin' part of the party. 

Mary is home from school now and is getting the last minute things ready.  The house is clean and the car is clean so I think she won't mind if I play on the computer for a little while.

"Mom.  I need you to get off the computer and take me to the store to get eggs, please.  We need some for breakfast tomorrow."

I don't want to get off the computer.  After all, I paid for the computer and the electricity and EVERYTHING!  Who does she think she is?  I am the mom, It's my house.  I am in charge.  I quickly jumped up and marched over to her, stepping over the laundry she had folded, and into...into the really nice clean kitchen...with the yummy stuff that she had just taken out of the oven.  Wow.  Awesome.

I really did need the eggs.

"Ok," I said boldly..."but I get to drive."